Elegant well-dressed waiters glide around the room holding large phallic skewers of grilled meats out in front of them. The lights are dim enough to create a romantic ambience. The crowd is happy, stylish, salivating. Everything that goes into your mouth tastes amazing. This is the experience that I had this weekend at Espetus Churrascaria, the Brazilian steakhouse located at the corner of Market and Gough. This restaurant is more than just a restaurant; it’s a sexy dining experience.

The meat is the main reason to love this place. Although I don’t eat meat much and rarely eat steak, I have to say that every single morsel I put into my mouth was worth letting linger there on my tongue because of how delicious it was. Meat that literally melts in your mouth like butter sitting out on the counter on a warm day. Meat that is correctly described on the restaurant’s website as “succulent”. Meat that is brought right to the side of your table, sliced directly off of a large skewer that balances easily in the strong grip of your waiter. Meat that manages to make you feel sexy as it slides down your throat.

But there is more than just meat to this whole affair. There is an entire buffet of vegetable side dishes that you won’t want to miss out on (although you won’t want to indulge in too much either or you won’t have room for all of that sexy meat). Hearts of palm, grilled vegetables marinated in a tasty vinegar, mango salad … it’s an orgasm of the mouth just waiting to happen (and a buffet unlike any that you’ve ever been to).

Of course, no meal would be complete without drinks and dessert. Amazing sangrias that make you feel pleasantly tipsy although you don’t realize right away that they pack a little punch. Custards and other savory treats that you’ll wonder how you can fit into your body after indulging in so much meat. It’s the kind of meal that should be done Italian-style, that should be done the way that great sex is done, lingering for hours as your body digests and gets ready for more.

Mmmmmmmm.

Photo from yelp.

Recent Entries

• Sexy Fashionistas Networking and Having Fun
• Adding a New Local Boudoir Photographer to the List
• Regrettable Sex Storytelling
• Want to Win Last Year’s Sex Toy of the Year? Go to Good Vibes.
• Sexy SF Style Bloggers
• Espetus Churrascaria: Phallic Indulgence for Your Taste Buds
• Sex::Tech Conference 2010
• Sexy SF Girls on Bikes
• Sexy SF Hotel Deal: Spin, Whip and Sprinkle
• Like Beer? Like Burlesque? Free Thursday Night?

This entry was posted on Monday, March 1st, 2010 at 5:16 am and is filed under Food / Restaurants. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.